She's a Malaysian. Tied up. Loves the city and lives in it. Currently looking for a Marketing job in retailing / fashion / accessories. Calls herself a "young adult" 'cos that's what being 20+ means, right? *grin* . Meet Soniaaka PhoEbe.
WISH LIST
- Have another holiday in Australia!
- More mobile phone credits
- A trenchcoat like jacket
- My Delias's wishlist
- MY to come home
- Cushion to hug (big)
- 17" flat screened desktop
This is my blogchalk: Malaysia, Selangor, Petaling jaya, English, Chinese, Sonia, Female, Singing, performing, organising events, catching up with frens, spending time with loved ones, learning, cycling.
Thursday, August 30, 2007 :::
Knowing more means more disappointment
My poor darling is sick, I think. Didn't hear his call and now he's asleep. Hope he'll sleep it off & recover tmr! Haha.. ;P
Anyway, what's this thing about Merdeka day being "Malaysia's birthday"??? I keep hearing this "Happy birthday, Malaysia" on TV.....
Come on.. It's *not* the BIRTHday of Malaysia! 31st August 1957 was the Independence Day for 'Malaya' (aka HALF of Malaysia)! The birth of Malaysia's on September, ok! How did we get so screwed up and forget the meaning of 31st August??
Just like how other policies are screwed up as well... They all start with good intentions (I hope) and end up being manipulated & enforced for the wrong reasons.
Sorry I am not patriotic. Keranamu Malaysia (because of you) is was a good tagline, but it doesn't apply to many of us (minorities) because of SO many reasons. Yes, we are all disappointed. But we do hope for a better tomorrow. But no, we cannot be patriotic and all excited because we deserve better.
( Sigh. Politics. )
I just celebrate Merdeka because it means FREEDOM (free from being conquered, no curfews). And just for fun. ...Although, I've a feeling I'll be home tomorrow; watching t.v.
I've fallen ill again. Sigh. Feeling feverish & a sharp pain in my throat. Who would've thought I'd fall sick? I was perfectly fine on Saturday (!) other than feeling really tired.. But I felt weak all over, on Sunday morning.
Other than that, I've "won" some dining vouchers from Sunway Corp! Yay!! Another thing I have got from them. Even though it's not a BIG win + the fact that I might need to use them vouchers to (still) PAY for my food, I'm happy about it. Hopefully it'll come in handy when we provide my mum with options as to WHERE does she wana makan (have a meal) on her BIRTHDAY! =)
You know, I hope u guys WILL forgive me for complaining about my internet so often. But seriously it's so frustrating, because sometimes my internet becomes stagnant only after a minute. OR, it suddenly decides to get disconnected. This results in even the simplest task (like creating a new email account) become such a difficult thing to do! Things that'd only take 2 minutes to do, would then take 10 minutes or more... Simply because sometimes I can't even connect online in hours! Seriously, no joke!
Sigh.
Anyway, I went for some Lina Joy 'discussion' thingy in church. And the speaker also talked about other ppl in similar situations, such as Rawati (dunno if i spelt it correctly?) - bout Article 11, the freedom of religion @ conscience. And a couple of other things. Sigh. So sad about how all "policies" were started because of good intentions and over the years have successfully been manipulated for ppl's own selfish gains.
At least now I know the root of cause, and can "control" my disappointments or anger *to a certain point* -- with me knowing what to pray for (for a better tomorrow)....
Haha, i really should stop procrastinating my post on the irritating person I met on the bus. Think of her also $%#@$*&! =P
I wish I could be more optimistic about tomorrow BUT... oh I dunno! ... This feeling, it hurts!
You have no idea how terrible I feel right now.
Couldn't cry it out because I (am) was not only sad, I was also mad! I have no one to talk to right now. The stupid (situation) & person who caused this is unavailable. I even have a feeling that after my explanation, things would *not* be better. In fact, I would probably feel WORSE because I expect any smart a$$ person who NOW understands my situation (after my explanation) would know what went wrong. AND then appologize to me for being so inconsiderate! -- Not ignore the situation & move on with life like nothing happened!
It is not whether or not that person applogizes. It is whether or not the donkey realises that it was all a MISUNDERSTANDING and feel sorry for what had happened afterwards!
I am sorry, but something inside me died today. I am not sure if u can fix it. But if u try hard enough, i'm certain it'd become alive again. I sure hope u know how much damage u have done today. Although, I dare not expect a lot to happen...
Now u can see why I have difficulties trying to release my tension (by crying).... U can obviously see how sad, disappointed AND mad I am at the same time!
Oh please, God, let me sleep peacefully tonight! Do miracles. Let me sleep in peace..............
Pardon my language today. Although not vulgar, but yea, I sound angry. Not safe for kids below 12 years of age! Heh, still can make (lame) 'jokes'. Whatever.
I lost my pay cheque and felt so bad about it. Making a bad impression of myself only la. =( *sigh* What's worse is, my boss has to pay a fine + write in to the bank to cancel the cheque and issue a new one to me.
I said I'd pay for the cancelation fees. But stillll....
*Continues to mumble to self* Of all times, I had to lose it when I need the money the most! ARGHHH.
Guess there's always a first! ....... How would u feel when u have to call ur boss and tell him/her that u lost ur cheque? =\
I've a feeling that I'm becoming more 'introverted'?
I hope not.
If I really were to become more 'quiet', I really wouldn't know myself anymore! =\
In case ur wondering, I am neither an extreme intro/extrovert. I'm a combination of both, but I am leaning more towards an extrovert. May be u've already guessed it, but u prolly wouldn't have either. 'Cause we all know that the online world is where the quiet OR noisy (haha) talk. ;P
It feels good to be a lil personal on my blog posts @ entries. It's somewhat a relief? May be u readers don't feel the difference, but I definitely feel a more personal connection with my blog, here. With my honest yet short/simple update. Recently, I've been fairly more relaxed (thus happier overall). It's good. It's nice. I need less reassurance. It's less energy draining.
Although, I am getting a little bored & LOW ON CASH.
I need to get a permanent job, now that I have decided what I wana do + in which industry I'd prefer to be in. I've mentioned it in my previous post -- Marketing, in the Fashion (accessories / apparel) Industry.
Yeap. Basicaly, these were all that was on my mind. Me - more 'carefree', broke, and needing a job / career. Incidents blogging (story telling) will have to wait. =]
Got my internet back. That means: back to unstable + limited access to internet.
I thank my dad for cutting off my previous subscription to *a certain* internet provider, because that gets me less hooked to the computer. On the other hand, I get frustrated with this unstable internet that I have right now. It sometimes takes me more than 10 minutes to complete just a simple task online! ARGH.
Anyway, it's late and I am quite lazy to blog today. My throat hurts again (after 1 week). Hopefully I won't fall sick AGAIN!
Hope to be able to work in the fashion industry (doing marketing). Any job openings that u know of? =)
